The Deadliest Warrior

So I couldn't find a video game to play on my PC that would hold my attention during family living room time tonight, so I consulted my "Ultimate Mental List of things I said I would do one day when I had time." So I logged onto http://warrior.spike.com and started watching the episodes of Deadliest Warrior that I didn't catch during the season because of karate, second job, etc.

The first one I watched was Nazi SS versus Viet Cong. I think they screwed the pooch on this one. Their computer algorithm seems to have no way of figuring in the way an asymmetrical war is fought. The Germans faced symmetrical fighting from inferior armies. The Viet Cong fought off the French and US armies. Umm, didn't the U.S. Army defeat the Germans?

The next one is Musketeers in their foo-foo velvet costumes versus Ming warriors. I gotta go with the Ming on this, but the episode isn't over yet. They just discounted two misfires on the musketeer's sidearm and let the musketeer shoot his musket with a monopod. I call that lame. The Ming Dao sword is pretty sweet. I like asian swords though so I might be biased. Yeah. They screwed the pooch on this one too. No way on earth a musket or a misfiring sidearm would keep the ming army at bay to keep the musketeers from getting chopped up by the ming. Weak sauce. On to Sun Tzu vs. Vlad the Impaler...

Sun Tzu was a freaking genius. So I'm going with him on this one. They impaled a ballistic gel body on a pike. Eek. There seems to be a bit of a misunderstanding about striking power versus technique on this show. They just showed two swords, the Kilij, used by Vlad, and the Scholar's Sword, used by Sun Tzu. The Kilij cut straight through a pig. The Scholar's Sword cut through most of a pig. Both deadly. I'd image the more agile and less weighty sword would be better in combat. I've grappled with stronger guys and submitted them by technique alone. I've sparred full contact and won rounds using technique against faster, stronger guys. I could have hurt them if we weren't just sparring. It's really all about technique. One of the dudes on Team Vlad is kinda creepy and wears black nail polish. I have a feeling they're not going to mention Sun Tzu's amazing tactics which are still in use today in this show. They just demonstrated how Sun Tzu's army could turn a field into a 900 degree Fahrenheit furnace and downplayed it. Ugh. The Chinese repeating crossbow was pretty badass. What I'm learning watching this is that dudes that take the time to learn medieval european weapons kinda give me the heebie jeebies. Hmm. Wouldn't Sun Tzu also have an army to work with? Vlad wins according to the show. I'm not so sure though.

Next up: Celt vs. Persian Immortal. I'm betting that the Persians win, because they have chariots. Oh. The Celts have chariots too. I might go with the Celts on this one because it's just hard to root for Persia no matter what. Plus, the Celts wear plaid! The interstitial clips seem to show the Persians with wicker shields. I hate wicker, therefore I hope the Celts win extra. This is easily one of the better episodes of the second season, classic Deadliest Warrior in presentation and stupidity. Sigh. I love this show. Let's see who wins. Oh, before the final "fight" I have to mention that the chariot scythes are stupid. Heh. I'm 0 for 3 tonight on predicting the winner. Lame.